My Very Worst Roommate

I think I could write an entire FML book on the person I’m living with right now. She is a disgrace to community. Enough said.

I don’t think switching on a fan in the month of December amounts to being a big deal; what’s so ‘pragmatic’ about that!? It’s always summer time in Australia in December, surely people DO switch on fans at the time? Also, I would consider switching it off if her obscene voice didn’t drift all the way from the other side of the room screaming disgusting moans and god knows what to four different suitors at all times of the night.

It’s extremely easy to portray hate towards her because of her sheer stupidity. You could compare her voice to the sound of five trolls farting and you can only guess who’s going to win that melodious competition. She looks like a psychotic version of the she-hulk. (YUCK!)

It’s a good thing this house has many more rooms because I don’t plan on seeing her face ever again if I can help it.

She’s the reason I can’t even hear the voices in my head anymore because I’m so sickened by learning the various things one can do while being in the company of other people who you don’t even know.

Don’t even get me started on the cleanliness factor.

x EdgyShark x


About edgyshark


Posted on December 9, 2011, in Existence and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. Well, my beloved housemate is all this and more. He’s messy, irresponsible, wastes electricity, doesn’t clean up after himself. The beauty of it all is that he is Portuguese and doesn’t speak English that well. FML.

  2. Oh, I so totally feel you, Madame :/ I’ve a roommate who’s the most selfish, snobbish, disgusting, narcisisstic crapbag ever.

  3. Damn, you just reminded me of my own jackass ex-roommate!

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